You Ruined Me

Yesterday I mentioned how it was the 5 year anniversary of my Dad’s passing.  One of the interesting insights that I’ve discovered since then is how much I learned from him.  I never realized that before.  For some reason I thought that I had just developed into the man I am today.  I didn’t understand that he had so much to do with it.  Call me clueless.  Through the years some of the things that he taught me were:

    To work hard.
    To be responsible.
    To not waste anything.
    To be kind.
    To be respectful.
    To be honest.
    To be loyal.
    To be a man.
    To laugh.
    To persevere and not give up.
    How to catch a baseball properly.
    How to use a paint brush.
    How to drive a nail straight.

Now, as I get on the other side of life, I realize how much I’m like him.  This is a good thing. 

I was privileged to be able to preach at and conduct his memorial service.  It was one of the great privileges of my life.  I also wrote a poem for the occasion.  My sister wrote one too.  My poem was a tribute to him.  It’s entitled, You Ruined Me.  You will understand what I mean as you read it.

                                                              YOU RUINED ME

There are times when I want to call in sick to work....when I’m tired, the warm bed is hard to leave, or the weather is bad.....but I can’t
    Instead....I trudge faithfully off to work......you ruined me

There are times when I see others fail to follow through on their commitments.... when they make promises that they have no intention of keeping.....and I’m tempted to do the same.....but I can’t
        Instead...I keep all of my promises...I keep all of my commitments...you ruined me

There are times when I want to complain about my lot in life.....how bad I have it, how hard it is, how my situation is worse than anyone else’s.....but I can’t
    Instead....I end up being thankful that it’s not worse than it is....you ruined me

There are times when I get tired of focusing on the needs of others....when I want to be selfish and focus on my own needs.....when I want to be on the receiving end for a change.....but I can’t
    Instead....I continue to put the needs of others ahead of my own....you ruined me

There are times when I don’t want to pull my share of the weight.....when I just want to coast and let others do the heavy lifting......but I can’t
       Instead...I lower my shoulder once more....and help carry the load....you ruined me

There are times when I want to lash out at my detractors.....when I want to put them in their place.....and tell them like it really is.....but I can’t
    Instead.....I keep silent....and humbly continue on....you ruined me

There are times when I get tired of doing good....when it seems like my efforts don’t matter.....when I just want to throw in the towel.....but I can’t
    Instead....I keep on doing what I know is right.....trusting God for the results.... you ruined me

Now that I’m older, wiser, more mature.....I look back on those I once envied....on those who always took the easy road.....and I am shocked....for that is not who I wanted to become after all

Instead.....I find that all those years of taking the hard road.....of doing the right thing.....of following your example....has built character in me....and made me into the man I am today.....the man I always wanted to be

So....here I stand.....I’ve reached my goal....I’ve realized by dream
     And.....I say to you, with all my heart....Dad, I’m glad you ruined me!


Dad, I still miss you.  Thanks for being such a great Dad.  Such a good example.  For loving Jesus so much.

Lord, I thank you again for my Dad.  For the man who was larger-than-life to me.  For the man who was so respected.  And loved by so many people.  I am glad that he knew You.  And loved You.  And served You.  And I am glad that he ‘ruined’ me.  In Jesus’ name, Amen.