Continuing yesterday’s post and my feelings of failure and frustration in ministry. I am called to be a pastor. But I don’t often feel like I’m making the grade. What should I do?
I pray. A lot. I cry out to God. I am so pathetic. I have so many shortcomings and weaknesses. How in the world is anyone getting anything out of my ministry? Then something happens. I think for a moment. I have been caught in the trap of being self-critical. Of looking only where I come up short. And not where I have succeeded. Of looking only at what I don't like about ministry. And not what I enjoy. It turns out that there is a lot I actually like about ministry. I enjoy reading and studying the Bible each day. And I definitely like preaching. And teaching. I like seeing people being transformed by God's amazing power. I enjoy the relationships that I've developed over the years with so many people. As I am thinking about all this, something else happens. I get positive feedback from others. They confirm that God is using me. An encouragement card. A verbal word of praise. Or thanks. Occasionally someone mentions how a sermon spoke to them. Or they mention how much a visit meant to them. They tell me that they regularly read my blog. And are blessed by it. Who knew?
I pray. A lot. I cry out to God. I am so pathetic. I have so many shortcomings and weaknesses. How in the world is anyone getting anything out of my ministry? Then something happens. I think for a moment. I have been caught in the trap of being self-critical. Of looking only where I come up short. And not where I have succeeded. Of looking only at what I don't like about ministry. And not what I enjoy. It turns out that there is a lot I actually like about ministry. I enjoy reading and studying the Bible each day. And I definitely like preaching. And teaching. I like seeing people being transformed by God's amazing power. I enjoy the relationships that I've developed over the years with so many people. As I am thinking about all this, something else happens. I get positive feedback from others. They confirm that God is using me. An encouragement card. A verbal word of praise. Or thanks. Occasionally someone mentions how a sermon spoke to them. Or they mention how much a visit meant to them. They tell me that they regularly read my blog. And are blessed by it. Who knew?
To bring this full circle, what I have finally discovered about ministry is, “I like it! I really like it!” There is nothing else I want to do with my life. As hard and as difficult as it is at times, ministry is the only thing I can do. Anything else would be waste of my God-given talents. No, I haven’t arrived. And probably never will. And no, I will never be able to get all the ministries that I want to have up-and-running in my church. And it is probably never going to become a very large church. But that’s OK. I’m doing what God wants me to. Where He wants me to do it.
And isn’t that about the best that any of us can hope for? I mean, which one of us has the ‘perfect’ job? Which one of us feels like we are constantly performing to our potential? That we are doing well in every area of our lives? Which one of us isn't painfully aware of our weaknesses and shortcomings? Which one of us doesn’t deal with feelings of failure? Or get discouraged from time to time? The fact is that we all do. Some do more than others but no one is exempt.
And isn’t that about the best that any of us can hope for? I mean, which one of us has the ‘perfect’ job? Which one of us feels like we are constantly performing to our potential? That we are doing well in every area of our lives? Which one of us isn't painfully aware of our weaknesses and shortcomings? Which one of us doesn’t deal with feelings of failure? Or get discouraged from time to time? The fact is that we all do. Some do more than others but no one is exempt.
What's the answer? First of all, to know that we are in the center of God's will. When you know that you are right where God wants you to be, it is a great means of comfort and encouragement. Secondly, to know that God will help us. I love Romans 8:32 and think of it often. "He who did not spare His own Son, but gave Him up for us all - how will He not also, along with Him, graciously give us all things?" The point is clear. If God gave us Jesus to save us from our sins, He will give us whatever we need to accomplish His will - strength, wisdom, patience, understanding, etc. Thirdly, to know that God is pleased with effort. He knows that we are human. He made us! He knows that we will stumble from time to time. And even fail. And He's OK with that! Because He knows that we are doing the best that we can under the circumstances. The fact is that God never asks more than what we are capable of!
So if you feel that you're not cutting it in life, that you're not a good spouse, or parent, or employee, or Sunday School teacher, relax. Continue to have faith in God. Keep on doing what you're doing. If He wants you to do things differently He will tell you. Remember that others are not your judge. And neither are you! God is your judge. And it just might be that He is not as hard and demanding as you think He is. Also be aware that you have more successes than you give yourself credit for. Think about what it is that you are doing right. The places where you see God blessing. You need to hold on to this when discouragement and disillusionment come. Learn to be content where you are. That was Paul's advice. Focus on what you like. It's probably more than what you think it is. Bloom where you are. Someday you will see what God accomplished through you. And you will be amazed! And grateful to Him!
Lord, there are times when I am my own worst enemy! Help me to remember that I am where You have led me - doing what You want me to do. If you want me to go somewhere else - or to do things differently - let me know. I will obey. Otherwise I am going to continue to do my best, right where I am, as You enable me. Help me to be faithful and to trust You for the results. In Jesus' name, Amen.
Pastor Jim, We have all felt these short comings at times as you are very well aware of. I have found that when this happens God gives me someone to breath a fresh spirit of life into me. So, please let me be that to you now. When I was a Junior in High School you came along side of me and built into me for a week. Little did you know that I would be back for the next few years and end up being a pastor myself. Pastor Jim one of my students came to know Christ as his Lord and Savior two weeks ago. You had a hand in that. You practiced the art of discipleship. It is truly an art. Sometimes we don't even know what we are doing or what the final picture will look like. None the less we keep practicing that art because God takes what we have and makes a beautiful masterpiece. Keep on painting my friend. God is making a masterpiece!
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