Recently, in an attempt to die to self, I have begun each morning by quoting Galatians 2:20. "I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me." It's a verse that I memorized many years ago. It is a verse that I am trying to make a reality.
I must say that, thus far, my track record of dying to self is rather abysmal. A case in point is a situation that occurred a month ago. I was talking to someone from our church on a Monday morning who was going on and on about how great this church was that they attended over the weekend (while they were visiting family). It was a 'happening' church. The longer they talked, the more upset I got. When they were finished I was ticked. I suppose the reason why I felt this way is that I was terribly convicted that our church was not a 'happening' church - and it should be, I want it to be, God wants it to be. Needless to say the rest of the day I brooded over this perceived offense.
Later that night, as I was taking a shower, God spoke to me. "What did you pray for this morning?" I stopped and thought for a moment. I prayed to die to self. Ouch! I had prayed to die to self and not more than two hours later I had a perfect opportunity to do so - and failed! The worst part of it is - that I went the whole day without seeing this!
Thank you, God, for Your gentle rebuke. Don't give up on me. And help me not to give up on dying to myself. I am going to get this right - even if it kills me!
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